


Surviving in Modern Seoul (While Also Hiding The Fact That You're A God)

by xol (firetruck)



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Gods & Goddesses, Alternate Universe - Olympian Gods, Gen, M/M, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-21
Updated: 2017-02-21
Packaged: 2018-09-26 00:41:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9854336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/firetruck/pseuds/xol
Summary: Life on Mount Olympus is easy (music, ambrosia, and sex). Life in the big city (bills, responsibilities, jobs)...? Not so much.





	

“Happy Birthday,” Jisung whispers to himself.With one breath, he blows out a single candle on the cupcake in front of him. Waving the smoke away, he removes it from the pastry and hops off his chair to toss it in the trashcan. 

When he turns around to finally enjoy the birthday cupcake he made for himself, he finds the counter suddenly occupied by the resident glutton, Baekhyun. 

Sprawled across the counter like he owns it, Baekhyun munches on the cupcake loudly, smacking his lips.

“Hi, Hermes,” Jisung sighs.

“It’s Baekhyun,” comes the muffled reply. Crumbs spill onto his shirt. 

“You’re eating my birthday cupcake.” 

Baekhyun stops mid bite, mouth hanging open unattractively. He quickly holds out the half eaten cupcake and Jisung steps back from his outstretched hand. 

“Oh shit dude, it’s your birthday? What are you turning now, twelve?” 

“Thirteen, actually… and you can keep the cupcake.” 

Baekhyun shrugs and pops the rest in his mouth. 

“Thanks, man.” 

 

 

 

“I know how you feel,” Sehun laments. “On my birthday last year, no one came to wish me happy birthday until eleven minutes after midnight. Eleven minutes is kind of a ridiculous time, don’t you think? I mean, it was my birthday. I should’ve been taking calls left and right!” 

“You don’t actually have a phone,” Jisung points out, criss cross applesauce across from him. “And you live in the middle of the woods with no reception..” 

Sehun looks positively offended and Jisung shifts uncomfortably on the moss floor.

“So? They’re gods? You’re a god? Figure something out!” 

“I guess,” Jisung shrugs lamely. “But I think we’re missing the point here. We were kind of talking about my birthday..” 

Sehun shushes him with a wave of his finger. 

“Um, I’m not finished.” 

Jisung lets out a sigh far too weary for someone at his age and lets Artemis launch into another rant. 

 

  

 

“Hephaestus! Hephaestus!” Jisung holds his shirt over his nose, hovering by the door. Just being down here is suffocating—only one step into the workshop and he feels himself being covered by a thin layer of soot. 

Chanyeol wears a gigantic mask over his face as he hunches over his work desk. Fire roars behind him and machinery clanks loudly, creating a racket that assaults Jisung’s ears. Maybe this was the reason why Hephaestus was always shouting.

A red hot sword lay on the table that Jisung approaches, and he jumps backwards when Chanyeol begins hammering into it. 

“Hephaestus..?” He tries again, using all his strength to yell, but to no avail. It was clear that Hephaestus could not be disturbed no matter how much his name was called, so Jisung decided to leave before anymore smoke got into his lungs. 

As he closes the door behind him, Chanyeol lifts up his mask, swiping a gloved hand over his forehead to catch falling beads of sweat. He looks around the room, sure that he had heard something. 

“Huh. I could’ve sworn…”

 

 

 

“Oh my Gods and Goddesses, it’s your birthday?” Junmyeon, horrified, crushes Jisung into a hug. “I’m so sorry. I knew I was forgetting something! Damn you, Kris.” 

“Um, what do I have to do with any of this?” 

Junmyeon glares at him. “If you hadn’t tried to fight those raccoons like I warned you, I wouldn’t have had to patch you up and then I would’ve had enough time to bake a cake!” 

“I didn’t fight any raccoons!” 

“Really? Then what were those scratch marks on your back?” 

“I was having an affair.” 

Jisung squirms as Junmyeon’s grip tightens. 

“I can’t breathe,” he squeaks out, but it’s too late. He’s caught in the crossfire of yet another Zeus vs. Hera battle.

 

 

 

Jisung is still recovering from being used as Hera’s stress ball when Hades glides down the corridor towards him, a large hood thrown over his head. His cape trails behind him for several feet, and as he gets closer Jisung notices the candle being clutched in his hand. It’s dripping with wax and getting all over his hand, but the god of the underworld barely flinches. 

“Birth,” Jongdae says flatly as he passes by. 

Baffled, he turns around, but Jongdae is already long gone. 

“…Thank you?” 

 

 

 

Yixing smiles, adjusting his large sun hat. 

“Thank you for helping out.” 

“It’s no problem,” Jisung replies, tilting the watering can forward. Tao grumbles somewhere in the background, water trickling out of his fingertips as he squats by a patch of peonies. 

“I know you’re probably busy, so I appreciate this a lot.” 

Jisung shakes his head. “Today is my off day. Thought I should at least be resting on my birthday.” 

“Oh!” Yixing gasps softly. “We should get you a cake!” 

“What do you want it to say?” His interest piqued, Tao abandons the peonies. 

“Do we want a talking cake?” 

“Cakes don’t talk, Yixing.”

“But you just said…”

Jisung laughs, but it sounds deflated. “It’s okay. Thanks anyways. Bye, Poseidon. See you later, Demeter.” 

The two gods hardly notice Jisung making his exit over their bickering. 

 

 

 

Jisung is pouring himself a glass of orange juice when he almost stumbles over Aphrodite hiding behind the counter. 

“…Aphrodite? What are you doing under the table?” 

Minseok smiles up at him before getting up, dusting his clothes off. 

“Jisung,” he says sweetly. “How are you?” 

He sighs, lowering his juice. 

“Frankly, not that great…it’s been a difficult day.”

Minseok frowns and places a hand on his shoulder, prompting him to go on. Finally feeling appreciated and acknowledged, Jisung begins his story, only to be interrupted by the god of war thumping down the hallway. 

“Minseok!” Luhan roars from outside, “Where are you?” 

“Oh no. Gotta go, Jisung. I’ll listen to your story later, maybe?” Placing a quick kiss to the crown of his head, Minseok dashes out of the kitchen. Not a second later, Luhan bursts into the room, door slamming against the wall. 

“Have you seen Minseok?” 

Jisung shakes his head. 

“I smell him,” Luhan mumbles under his breath. “He was _here._ ”

“You’re so weird.”

“Shut up!”

 

  

Athena is flipping through and old book when Jisung quietly sneaks into the library, seating himself at the same table. He twiddles his thumbs and swings his legs back and forth, waiting to be noticed. He even sneezes once, the dust irritating his nose, but Athena only mutters “Bless you,” and nothing else. Scooting his chair forward, he attempts to lean over and catch a glimpse of the book, but the chair slips on the newly waxed floor and he falls right over. 

His tailbone is throbbing as Athena finally puts down the book and ducks under the table to look at him, eyes wide with surprise. 

“…Hestia?” Kyungsoo’s eyebrows draw together. “Are you alright down there?” 

Humiliated, Jisung has no choice but to nod.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” he winces. “Just came to say hi.” 

Kyungsoo nods. “Hello, then.” 

Jisung slinks out of the library soon after, not even bothering to mention his birthday.

 

 

Somehow, Jisung finds himself in Apollo’s dance studio, lying on the couch. 

“Hey, lil’ dude,” Jongin pants in-between popping and locking. 

“Hi,” Jisung grumbles, not in the mood to join Jongin’s pop and lock session for once. 

“You okay?” 

Jisung purses his lips. 

“Absolutely.” 

Jongin nods, but Jisung’s not sure if that was an acknowledgement of him or just part of his routine. He’s mesmerizing on the dance floor, as always, and before he knows it Jisung sinks into the couch and closes his eyes. He’s glad Jongin chose today as ballet day. 

 

 

 

“No one remembered my birthday,” Jisung says, voice getting dangerously close to a whine. “I mean, Jongdae remembered, but he was really weird about it. I’m still not totally convinced he didn’t just do that randomly.” 

Dionysus nods, sipping at a glass of red wine. “That sucks.” 

“They’re always like this,” he continues. “Centuries later and they still think about no one but themselves. I know they’re gods, but just once, just once I’d like for them to be..be…”

“Not assholes?” Seunghyun supples helpfully. 

“Yes!” 

“It sounds like you’re pretty upset about this.” 

“I am!” 

“It sounds like you might be a little…angry.”

“I…I am. I’ve had enough! I won’t put up with this anymore. I’m going to lock them out of Mount Olympus until they can behave properly. I’m the god of hearth and home. I can definitely do that.”

Seunghyun chokes on his wine. This is too good. 

“Thank you, Seunghyun,” he hears Jisung say. 

“Please, call me T.O.P.” Seunghyun wipes the corners of his mouth. “Happy birthday, kid.” 

 

 

* * *

 

 

“What do you mean we’re locked out of Mount Olympus?” Baekhyun screeches, slowly rising into the air. Yixing tugs on his shirt and he settles back down, feet touching the ground again.

“I mean,” Kyungsoo snaps, “we’ve been shut out.” 

“This doesn’t make any sense!” Kris interjects. “That’s not even possible, is it?” 

Kyungsoo frowns. “It might be possible if…” He trails off and Minseok finishes his sentence, eyes wide. 

“Jisung!” 

Chanyeol scratches his head in confusion and Minseok lays a hand on his arm. Luhan squints at them. 

“Okay, who pissed off Jisung?” Junmyeon steps forward with his arms crossed, a horrible expression set on his face. 

“I ate his birthday cupcake,” Baekhyun admits. “But he said it was okay!” 

“You’re a dumbass,” Kyungsoo reminds him.

“Anyone else?” 

Everyone shrugs. Sehun turns his head away. 

If anyone had been present to witness this, it would have been quite a ridiculous sight to see. Twelve major gods perched at the edge of Mount Olympus like sitting ducks, all expressing varying degrees of confusion and frustration. The most powerful beings on Earth unable to enter their own home, their main source of power just out of reach, and all at the mercy of someone a mere thirteen centuries old.

Just as Luhan is about to physically fight the mountain in an attempt to get back in, Seunghyun prances towards them with a knowing smirk on his face. There’s a glass of wine in one hand and a letter in the other. 

“Delivery for the big twelve!” He singsongs, cheeks rosy, and Baekhyun bristles. 

“That’s _my_ job!” 

“Kinda hard to do now that you’re locked out,” Seunghyun muses. The letter is snatched out of his hands. 

“What does it say?” 

Everyone plus Seunghyun crowds around to read the slip of parchment. 

 

_“You can come back when you learn how to behave like adults! >:/_

_XXX-XXX_

_Seoul XXXXXXX_

_XXXXX-XX_

_XXXXX-XXXX_

_REP OF SOUTH KOREA_

_-Hestia, God of Hearth and Home”_

 

“Savage,” Jongdae comments after a stretch of silence. 

“What are we supposed to do now?” 

Junmyeon purses his lips and folds the parchment up. 

“I guess we’re about to learn how to survive in modern day Seoul.”

**Author's Note:**

> "is this what youve been working on for the past two weeks" yes  
> "instead of updating other things" yes
> 
> i'm working on the second chapter of the gang au sequel i swear..  
> but this has currently taken over my life a little  
> i've had this idea in my head since /forever/ and i can't believe its finally happening
> 
> heaps of love to my beta E, who inspired me to actually start writing this down and who sat on the couch with me to world-build for two hours straight (and also just for tolerating me and my writing struggles overall)
> 
> Zeus - Kris  
> Hera - Suho  
> Hephaestus - Chanyeol  
> Ares - Luhan  
> Aphrodite - Minseok  
> Athena - Kyungsoo  
> Apollo - Jongin  
> Artemis - Sehun  
> Poseidon - Tao  
> Demeter - Yixing  
> Hades - Chen  
> Hermes - Baekhyun
> 
> Hestia - Jisung (NCT)  
> Dionysus - Seunghyun/T.O.P. (BIGBANG)


End file.
